Sporknotes: A Brief History of Birthday

Thank you, friends, family, and complete strangers, for the incredibly sweet birthday wishes!!

I looked up the history of my birthday, hoping to find some incredible events, like Santa’s release from jail or the invention of the baked bean, but instead I found … some other stuff. So, I present you with a Brief History of May 13th.
(Special shout-out to my pals at Wikipedia for providing me with this information.)

In 1848, Finland debuted its national anthem. It’s … catchy?

In 1917, three Portuguese kids claimed they saw Our Lady of Fátima, later resulting in about twenty different ill-produced movies that I watched at my Catholic elementary school. I feel like I had this particular one memorized:

Our Lady of Fatima

I share my birthday with Bea Arthur and Dennis Rodman, who also apparently share my love for dress up.

birthday beaDennis Rodman birthday

Lena Dunham was born on May13, 1986, and set an impossible bar for young female writers/actors/show-runners/naked people everywhere.

Lena Dunham birthday'

I think the most historically significant May 13th happened in 1996 when Mrs. Jacquelyn Wolfgram organized The Best Birthday Party Ever. (This isn’t on Wikipedia, but you’ll have to trust me.) There was a homemade bean bag toss that involved throwing things into the mouth of a cat painted on a big piece of cardboard. There were slap bracelets in the goody bags. Everyone in my class was invited, and the cake had Timone and Pumba figurines ON IT. As in, I got to eat cake covered in icing and TOYS. Plus, I got to turn six, which you really only get to do once. It was pretty awesome, I highly recommend it.

Young Christina

Twenty-three has not been too shabby thus far (grown up Christina does have a few things over young Christina, like a driver’s license, a really nice boyfriend, and the legal ability to drink alcohol), but I carry that Lion King cake from the Giant bakery in my heart. Here, take a piece. Make sure to get some with blue icing — it will dye your tongue.

Happy May 13th, everyone!! Hearrrrrttttzzzzzzzz!Especially you, Mom. This is all your doing.


11 thoughts on “Sporknotes: A Brief History of Birthday

  1. Your dad had a little something to do with it. Ha ha! I know, TMI. We love you and cherish you and wish you an astounding 24th year. Just remember to be safe, be true to yourself (and to us), love yourself (and us), love and help others less fortunate (and us), and Remember the Titans (one of my favorite movies – well any movie about an underdog sports teams is one of my favorite movies). I love you and miss you more than words can say, so I won’t say them.


  2. It’s Rich’s birthday today too, so I will share the May 13th info with him… I know he will enjoy learning the Finlandic song… You could sing it as a duet!

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