How to Lose Weight

I think you are beautiful just the way you are, you know that right? But I want you to feel beautiful, too, and the holidays are descending upon us like the Apocalypse, causing everyone to break out the elastic waistband pants and flowy, over-sized shirts. So here are some lifestyle tips and tricks I have […]

Crime Blotter #2

CRIMES AGAINST A PERSON At 10:12 A.M. on Oct. 10, a student worker was told to sharpen pencils at her on campus job. Over 400 pencils were found on the scene. After 2 hours at the electric sharpener, her will to live is in critical condition, but an expert in the field assured DPS that after […]