Excerpts from an e-book in progress: Sarah was waiting by the phone again. Outside her window on the ninth floor of NPR’s office, clouds rolled over the tall Chicago buildings, ominous and grey – multiple shades of grey. At the very least, ten to fifteen shades of grey. Sarah sighed and wondered what color the […]
Hey guys, I made my first ever beauty tutorial! Would love to know what you think. Ex Oh Ex Oh!
“Fast and easy,” said the box. “It will save you so much money,” said my debit card. “Absolutely, under no circumstances, should you do it yourself,” said the internet. But since when do I listen to the internet?
Happy Friday, you filthy animals!
I am so honored and overjoyed to see that our Les Mis parody inspired this group of (mustached) performers! A million thank yous to this random group of people that I’ve never seen before. I hope that someday we can all draw on eyebrows and pretend to be toothless children together in harmony!
Thank you, friends, family, and complete strangers, for the incredibly sweet birthday wishes!! I looked up the history of my birthday, hoping to find some incredible events, like Santa’s release from jail or the invention of the baked bean, but instead I found … some other stuff. So, I present you with a Brief History […]
A day changer is a sentence or an event or even just a weird eye contact situation that, well, changes your day. Day changers can be both negative and positive, so I’ve indicated which is which with — surprise! — negative and positive signs. You’re welcome. (I had two glasses of wine at lunch, so […]
Think of this as a PS to the viral video.
[This post contains crude language and some crazed lady-ranting. I’m not apologizing. I’m just saying.] Dear Mr. Wayne, Last week, a friend sat me down and insisted I listen to what he deemed “the most misogynistic song to ever exist.” While I usually don’t go out of my way to listen to music that will make […]
Have I mentioned that I have a dumb phone? Because I do. It has the IQ of a peanut. A peanut that has already been eaten, digested, and reunited with its deceased friends in peanut heaven. IT’S REALLY DUMB. However, I do have to give my dunce of a phone a little credit because it […]